My mom's flight lands in less than two hours. ( Here, have some whining. I just need to get it out before she gets here )

( This week's horoscope, via astroberry.com )

All that the day before my mom arrives. Coincidence? Probably, but it's definitely some food for thought.

Somewhat related, everything's ready for my mom's arrival, which is good as I'm sick! Yay. Jon started sniffling on Thursday, and my throat started to itch Friday night. Yesterday seemed to be my bad day - I was really stuffy and sneezy and a couple of other dwarves. I soothed myself with Jägermeister Popsicles, The Big Bang Theory DVDs, and a nap. I'm still not that great this morning, but hopefully I'll feel better tomorrow. My mom lands tomorrow afternoon.

Despite the head cold, I ran a lot of errands this weekend, including finally procuring a bed for my mom. It was something I waited too long to take care of, and it ended up causing me a lot of stress. But it's done and over with now, and she has a lovely bed to sleep in and I don't have to worry about it anymore.

Speaking of stress, we have our van back from the repair shop. Apparently the shop we'd be taking it to installed the wrong part. Twice. We had both axles replaced, one this past February, and one in February of 2011. Jon knew something was wrong when the car started to shake at higher speeds. We took it in to the shop we've been going to, told them we thought it was the axle, but they seemed convinced it was a transmission issue. So we took it to another shop, and yeah, it wasn't the transmission. One of the axles fell apart as soon as the mechanic took it off. Sigh. Jon and I will be having a talk with the first shop very soon. For now, it's safe to drive, which is the most important part.

Speaking of Jon, he's in his last week of school, which means finals. Any good thoughts sent his way would be very appreciated! His two big tests are Wednesday and Thursday.

In fannish news, we finally saw The Avengers, and yes, it was awesome. Also, Jon and I are watching White Collar on Nexflix, and wow, I love me a snarky con man. Also also, the season final of Glee is this week. ;_____; I'm probably going to spend my summer rewatching the first three seasons and wondering why in the hell I still watch this show. And reading fanfic. Lots and lots of fanfic.

( ETA: just some to-dos )

Happy Anniversary to me and Jon! 19 years. Plans for today include Jon being at school all day, where he will take a very long sectional test, and I get to meet with three different vendors, including the carpet cleaner. I also get to put back all the furniture when my rugs are dry. Also, hopefully, at some point today get to we'll pick up our car, as we had to take it to the shop last night for a mysterious shake in the front end.

We are party animals, I know you're all jealous.

Seriously, we'll do something nice this weekend when we have time/transportation. I just think it's funny we were both so busy today that our celebration consisted of a kiss and a "Happy anniversary" before Jon rushed out the door.

Me: *cleaning my glasses* All they do is sit on my face. I don't know how they get so dirty.
Jon: When you sit on my face, I get dirty.
Me: *trying not to laugh* ...that's not really the same thing.

He didn't even miss a beat. And this was before coffee. My husband, ladies and gentleman.

- I have finches on my back porch. They were trying to nest out there last weekend, but I think I finally dissuaded them from doing so. Babies would be adorable, but the mess would be quite the opposite. They seem to love sitting on the trellis when I have the shades up, though, and I love to listen to them chirp and sing, so it's become something of a win-win situation.

- I think I've finally found my zen re. my mom's visit. I've made a list, and I'm slowly and calmly working my way through it, and...yeah. I remember this. That my mom has chilled out considerably has helped, too. She was worrying me, frankly, but went to her doctor like a good girl, and isn't modern medicine a wonderful thing? So, what gets done, gets done, and what doesn't...well. It's fine.

- Work work work. I have maintenance going on all this week (people pay their rent and then want stuff fixed? Whatever.) and so since I have to be here, I am trying to take advantage of the nice weather to do things like garden and clean up outside areas. Tomorrow I plan to wash down all the walkways! Pigtails, baseball cap, and rubber boots. Don't you wish your landlord was hot like me?

- I have maintenance going on in my house, too. I'd called in my repairman to glue down a corner of linoleum that had come up in Zack's bathroom, only to find it had come up because the shower's been leaking. ARGH. But it's okay! I emptied out the bathroom, and let them at it. Now there's a new floor, and I'm having them repaint the whole thing, as it has been about 14 years since the last time we painted it. They'll finish up with a new ceiling fixture, new towel bars, light switches, etc. It's going to be lovely.

- Mother's Day is Sunday. I think I want to celebrate by finally going to see The Avengers.

- I am running the self clean on my oven, and omg you guys. I forgot how bad it smells. It's so gross. I set up the big industrial fan in hopes of clearing out some the smell, but it's still rather pungent. And once you start the self clean, you can't turn it off. I have half an hour to go. Phew!

- Jon and I did a lot of running around this weekend, just like last. It's nice to do all the things, but man, it's so exhausting. I had to quit on Saturday before we were done simply because I was peopled out. Still, I liked having breakfast with Jon and wandering through the fabric store and garden department. I bought some linen to finish the headboard we're making, and some ferns to replace the ones on my back patio that died in the cold. I also did a bit of thrift store shopping and came home with four shirts for $7. I think I am officially done with replenishing my summer wardrobe.

- Somewhat related to that last thing, the shopping was necessary because I've put on ten a few pounds since last summer. Bleh. I know some of it is health related, and some of it is emotional, but a good part is I've just gotten lazy. I've lost my motivation. No motivation = no exercise. I did a solid week of it at the beginning of last month, and then nothing. I'm trying to get back into it again, but it's hard. I know that now's the time though, as once I have my surgery it'll be a long while before I can do anything vigorous.

- I've been looking at this blog recently called bright side dweller. The woman who runs it posts photos of her outfits. I know there's a lot of these type of blogs out there, but I really like this one. I like her style. It's been encouraging me to think about my own wardrobe choices, and I have to say, I'm having fun playing dress up a bit.

- Work is worky. Yesterday I distributed twenty-four rental increases. Oh, the guilt! But so far no one's egged my car or left a flaming bag on my front doorstep, so I think I'm safe. Rents are just so much higher than they were a year ago - most of my residents are paying $100 to $200 less than the current market, even after their increases. Still, I hate having to put out the notices...it makes me feel like the Big Bad Landlord. Someone get me my curlers and my housecoat!

- My mom will be here in 22 days. I'm trying to find my zen.

Okay, the smell of the oven is making me dizzy. Time to work outside for a while. Thank goodness for wireless internet!

Saturday:

- went to Orchard Supply and purchased 3 new patio umbrellas for the courtyard + some misc. garden stuff
- went to Target and actually found a pair of white capris that both fit and look good
- picked up Five Guys for lunch (I was really hungry *eyebrow waggle*)
- brought umbrellas home and switched them out with the old ones
- helped a neighbor get her key out of her ignition (the car wasn't in park, oops)
- was rewarded for good deed with fresh lasagna and sourdough rolls. SO DELICIOUS. Also, dinner!
- tried to stay cool while we spent a quiet evening reading and eating ice cream

Sunday:

- slept in wonderfully late and then had breakfast made for me by my awesome husband
- emptied off the far side of the patio so we could install some trellis and a new roll-down shade ( probably interesting to no one, but here's some photos )
- ended up washing off the rest of the patio, including the chairs, roll-down shades, etc. (everything was covered in pollen, bleeeeeh)
- loaded up the car and went to the thrift store (where I dropped off six bags and bought two shirts) and the recycling center the money of which paid for my shirts
- picked up dinner
- put everything back on the patio, then sat on my butt for the rest of the night

The only thing I didn't accomplish that I'd hope to do was get a haircut. But, of course, my hair looked fabulous both days this weekend. I think it knows when I want to cut it, and does it to spite me. That's alright, hair, I know your game.

Today is for end-of-the-month paperwork and some gardening and general catching up on stuff for myself. It's also the first day in two weeks where I'll actually be alone (no one's on spring break anymore, yay!) so ooh de lally to that.

My mom is coming for a visit, and she will be staying with us. She arrives May 22. The original plan was for her to come June 15 so she could attend my nephew's HS graduation. But my niece is also graduating (she dropped out, but then went to adult school for her GED), and since her ceremony will be May 24, my mom is coming almost a month earlier than we were expecting. Also, she was supposed to stay for two weeks, but now she'll be here for almost a whole month so she can attend both events.

I feel like I have so much less time to do all the stuff I was planning to do before she gets here. I'm trying to finish projects and spring clean my house, spring clean the building and get repairs taken care of, and now my boss wants me to prepare and distribute rental increases. Oh, and I have an apartment for rent. It's a little nerve wracking, especially when there are times I can hardly get anything done at all (my oomph is just gone some days; it sucks). But I've reworked my schedule and have taken a few things off the list, including getting our new carpets. It's okay - we'll do them in the fall after I've had my surgery - but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little bummed out.

Mostly I am trying not to freak out about this. It's not that I don't want her here, it's just...28 days. Here, with us. My mom doesn't get that I'm an introvert, and since my dad died, she's been clingy. Understandably so, but god. I'm exhausted now; I can't imagine what it's going to be like when she's actually under my roof.

Anyway, this weekend I plan to accomplish things! I desperately need a haircut (the butchering I got a couple of months ago has grown out and it just looks weird - I need to get my layers reshaped something fierce), and I have to go to the garden store for a few items for the building, including new umbrellas. I do love to spend company money for pretty things. Also, the weather is gorgeous, and I am hopeful that I can talk Jon into helping me finish the patio. We've two more trellises and a new rolling shade to hang, and I think this weekend will be the perfect time to do it. And then we'll nap. Oh my god, we will nap.

I saw my gynecologist yesterday, and we've decided to move forward on my hysterectomy. It's going to happen sometime in late June/early July - my doctor's assistant will call me next month to schedule my pre-op and the surgery. I suppose I should be scared, but right now all I feel is excited. This is exactly the right time to have this done.

I'm also relieved! I'm tired of trying to mask the symptoms and living with this issue. I want to fix it and move on. I'm way too young to be dealing with this stuff.

I thought I had more to write, but it's been one of those weeks where my body decided it didn't want to work, and I'm just now getting back on track. Everything I wanted to say feels emo and whiny. Easter was hard. I miss my dad. Sinus headaches and periods are a miserable combination. Still, it's Friday, and I have nothing else that needs to be done today, and nothing that needs to be done this weekend, so I think I'm going to put on my yoga pants (even though it's only 3 pm), snuggle down with my new copy of Real Simple magazine, and call it a day.

(I've been reading all of your posts, but not really in the right head space to reply. Sorry about that.)

( ETA: tarot card reading woo-woo under the cut, mostly for my own reference )

Dear annoying resident,

Yes I know the water is shut off. No, it hasn't been over two hours; you're exaggerating. And no, I didn't inform you ahead of time (like I ALWAYS do) because it was an *sings it* ~emerrrrrgency!

Duh.

Also, knock on my door again with your keys and I will end you. Seriously, who does that?

In somewhat related news, the plumber is an absolute doll. I appreciate his taking the time to explain things to me, and not talking down to me while he does it. A gold star for you, sir!

Ahaha, and he's done. Water's back on, resident! Flush to your heart's content.

Anyone interested in a coat? Thigh length, black wool, woman's size 10. The buttons are a little loose and it could use a cleaning, but otherwise it's in great shape. If you're local, then it's yours if you come and pick it up. If you're not local, then yours for the price of shipping. I just want it gooooone.

I kept trying to figure out how to come back here and post after all of the personal family stuff, when I realized I just need to do it. So.

01. I discovered that a little Urban Decay's eyeshadow primer potion applied to my lashline before I put on my eyeliner will keep the liner in place all day. I tried it while in Massachusetts, knowing I was going to need some serious staying power through two days of services, but I've been using it since I came home and I love it. In fact, the other night I was so tired I went to bed without washing my face, and when I got up in the morning my eyeliner was still in place. Amazing.

02. While I was in Massachusetts, the residents I was in the process of evicting took off. Even though I was sure they were gone I had the sheriff come for the lock-out anyway. It's smart to finish the process - it looks good on paper. But it was a good thing for me as well, because when we entered the apartment we found it like ( this: )

RIGHT?! I just...wow. And that's only the living room. Imagine the bedroom, bathroom, dining room, kitchen, back porch, closets, and storage locker just as full. I had to hire a cleaning crew to empty it out. It took them about five hours, and they filled a trailer.

03. Spring cleaning plans are in full force, especially with Jon and Zack's breaks coming up. They're on different weeks for some weird reason, but I hope to get the new carpets installed during that time, and the back porch finished as well. I want to work on finishing the bedroom, too, but that involves painting - we haven't painted the ceiling or the doors yet - and that calls for warmer weather. Still, I might go ahead and repaint the doorjams, as I can do that unsupervised (I'm pretty bad at painting). Hmm.

04. I have managed to exercise every day this week. I am ridiculously proud of myself for that.

05. I'm about 90% sure I'm going to have my hysterectomy this summer. I have an appointment on April 12 to talk with my gyn about the procedure, options, etc. If everything looks good I want to schedule it for the end of June. Jon has a couple of big tests to take at the beginning of the month, but then he'll be off school until August, so it'll be the perfect time.

I...god, I'm so nervous about it, but I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired all the time. Nothing else has helped, and I can't accept that this is how I'm going to always feel. I'm not really living, and if surgery is the only thing that will fix it, then that's what I need to do.


It's absolutely gorgeous outside today, and my workload is delightfully light, so I think I shall go for a walk.

I'm home. We landed last night, but after saying goodbye to Jon's aunt and spending some time with Zack, we showered and fell into bed. Today Jon and I are playing catch-up, with fairly good results. We're unpacked. All the laundry's been washed and put away, and everything else is back where it belongs. My house is tidied. I took care of the few work things I needed to see to. Jon's sorting out the end-of-the month bills. The one thing I've utterly failed at is catching up on-line. I simply haven't the brain for it right now.

Thank you so much to everyone who sent messages or emails or sympathy cards. It means a lot to me. ♥

In Boston. Travel sucks. I won't relate the whole drama, but it took WAY too long to get here, and I am exhausted. And we haven't even gotten to my mom's yet.

( more info about my last post )

Thank you to all of you who posted little notes or emailed me. It was very sweet. ♥

Plans to wash down my kitchen cabinets are on hold as my sink is backed up. So now I'm sitting here reading fanfiction waiting for the plumber to arrive.

Um. Yay?

( my mom )

( eviction )

( personal health )

More than anything, I'm frustrated that my jeans are tight. It's making me super cranky.

To the awesome anonymous person what did something awesome for me:



Dwarf high-five! THAAAANK YOU. I was going to use one of those "Let me love you!" gifs, but they're all so creepy, ahaha.

1. It's raining! It was 70 just this past weekend, and is supposed to be 70 again in the next couple of days. Our weather seems to be on some sort of meteorological see-saw. Somewhat related, my allergies are here in full force, and I can't figure out what to wear from day to day. Yesterday I was in a t-shirt; today I'm in a sweater and boots. ETA: And now the sun's out. Oy.

2. Spring cleaning continues apace. I'm working in Zack's bathroom today, as I never got to it last week. I've a pile of tablecloths and old beach towels I need to ruthlessly sort through. I'm actually having a little trouble getting rid of them. The tablecloths, especially, as they're from when we used to do the big family holiday dinners. But now my parents are 2,500 miles away, Jon's mom and gram aren't with us anymore, and everyone else is pretty scattered. Sigh.

3. Goodbye extra user pics! My paid subscription expired today, and I went from 141 icons to only 71. I had to delete a LOT, which is fine. I think of it as spring cleaning my user pics. My paid account is up in a week, too, but I am going to renew that. As soon as I put some money in my PayPal account. And I know, I know...LJ sucks. But it's the only social media site I use with regularity, and I think keeping my paid features is worth it.

4. I am probably going to have to evict a resident. This is never a fun thing. But she's been a problem for a while, and most recently hasn't paid her rent yet for this month. This after a whole thing involving getting her rent from her just last month. If I don't have this month's rent by Wednesday, I get to call the lawyer. Whee.

5. The ducks are back. I think they've taken up permanent residence in my pool this year.

Two things of note from conversations with my son:

1. I told Zack that Jon and I were taking Kel out to lunch for her birthday tomorrow, and asked if he wanted to come with us. He thought for a moment, then said, "No, I'll stay home, but be sure to tell Kel happy birthday from me."

2. I asked Zack if anything interesting happened at school today. He told us that his English teacher talked to them about sex. I asked if it was a sex education talk. Zack said no, and that he knew where babies came from. So Jon asked if the talk was about sex in literature, and Zack told us the talk had been about sexuality and gender. He then told us, "I didn't participate in the conversation, but I listened with great interest."

For those of you who don't know, Zack has autism. He was non-verbal at the age of four, which is when we discovered his condition. Now at seventeen, he's incredibly self-reliant; he's just a bit of an odd duck. Communicating with him is challenging at times, exhausting at others, and yet other times (like today), it can be an utter delight.

Somewhat related, mad props to Zack's English teacher for discussing gender issues with a classroom full of high school juniors.

1. ( Let's just get the personal health stuff out of the way, shall we? )

2. I've been spring cleaning. Monday I attacked my craft closet and filled four bags. Old sewing patterns, fabric scraps, and a pile of picture frames - things I've held onto for too long. They're going to the thrift store this weekend. Sometime this week I plan to continue by cleaning out Zack's bathroom. It's the current home for all of our linens, and it's time I get rid of the old towels and sheets. Those are going to a local animal shelter, Pound Puppy Rescue.

3. I don't think I mentioned this here, but my dad's in the hospital. He was in a month ago with a really bad stomach flu, and after two weeks they released him. But when he came home he still wasn't able to keep any food in his system, and so my oldest brother finally convinced him to go back (Note: my dad is stubborn. We all know who I take after).

Apparently one of the medications they put my dad on (for a kidney issue) had nausea as a side effect. Seriously, guys? Your patient's been unable to keep anything down for two weeks, and you didn't think to check the side effects of his new prescription before you sent him home? Another side effect was depression, and when my mom couldn't even get my dad to come talk to me on the phone, we knew something was up.

Anyway, he's on an IV and is as of this morning eating solid food (and keeping it down), so we're hoping a couple more days of fluids and rest will do the trick. My brother and my mom both are being very adamant about the hospital not releasing my dad until we know he's well. Because, seriously.

4. I got to put one of my vendors in his place today. I'd called him last Thursday to schedule an apartment cleaning, and at the time I called he said he was busy but that he'd call me back later that afternoon. All day I waited for his call, and all day Friday as well. Friday afternoon I decided to call my "back-up" vendor since I needed someone out in just a few days. Last night, after I was closed for the day, the first vendor called and left a message, telling me he'd be out the next morning. I had already made an appointment with the other company, so I had to call him back and leave him a message letting him know I didn't need him.

He called me again just now, asking what time I wanted him out. The other company is already here, so, yeah. I told him to check his messages, we didn't need his services, and that maybe I would call next time. I think my main cleaning vendor has just become my back-up vendor.

5. ( A couple of photos from 'The Hobbit' )

OMG his faaaace. I'm not really a fan of the book, but I am getting more and more excited about this movie. I've missed the hobbits! Martin Freeman's Bilbo looks so much like Billy Boyd's Pippin that I can't help but to clap my hands and kick my feet every time I see him. Eeei.

1. Sherlock! What a delightful show. I know you all know that (I am so late to the party, haha), but I finally caught season one on Netflix, then found season two on line, and wow. When's season three, then?

2. It's been sunny and warm here all week, which I wasn't expecting. I was ready for six more weeks of winter, and then had to dig short-sleeved shirts out of storage so I'd have something to wear. NOT THAT I'M COMPLAINING. Because, seriously, give me all the sun. For a child of winter, I really dislike all the cold and dark that goes with it.

3. Spring cleaning! I'm actually doing some this week. Small things to start (as I don't trust yet that winter really is over), but god, it's nice. I'm still muzzy-brained and feel like I don't know what to do with myself, but I'm celebrating the small victories where I can get them. Yesterday I swept up the porch and tended to the plants and sorted the recycling and emptied the trash and shook out the rugs (on top of work + five loads of laundry). Today I'm dusting and vacuuming and washing the sheets so I can change the linens on the beds. If I can keep my oomph up, I hope to wash the couch and chair covers this weekend.

4. NO VACANCY. My two favorite words. :D I didn't even get around to putting a sign up. I had people randomly calling me before my last unit was vacant, and I rented it a couple of days ago. The turn-over maintenance isn't even finished. (Otherwise work's been stressful, but this is a happy list, so I'm not going there.)

5. Friiiiday. I have two days ahead of me with absolutely nothing planned. As I was making breakfast for Jon (at 6 in the morning, even though Zack has the week off), I turned to him and said, "I love you, but I am so not cooking you breakfast tomorrow." His reply was a kiss to my neck and a, "Breakfast at Starbucks it is." That is why he's my favorite.

( Bonus girly TMI and personal health stuff - as always, posting for my own records, feel free to skip )

( girlie TMI update )

Still, there's an upside. Yesterday I suddenly found myself with the urge to do something. I ended up spring cleaning my closet, and then giving my make-up drawer a good once-over. Anything that was too old, the wrong color, etc. got mercilessly chucked. It's not much, but it's a start.

I want to take a class. Or possibly join a gym. I want some kind of structured activity that I can do someplace other than my living room. Ideally I'd like to take a dance class, but so far all the classes I've found (that I'm interested in) are for kids or seniors. SIGH. I'm not giving up, though. If it comes down to it, I'll invest in an inexpensive DVD player and turn my rec room into a private exercise studio. Sometimes it's good to be the manager. Also, free Sunday yoga classes are still available at the local Sports Basement, which I plan to go back to very soon.

Jon and I spent the day out for his birthday. Mostly we poked around some shops, tried out treadmills (which we decided against for now), and then dropped off our van for its annual tune-up. So now we're carless (at least for the next day), but Jon has homework, and I think I'll see if I can find a project or two to lose myself in.

Disneyland 2012: Friday * Disneyland 2012: Saturday * Disneyland 2012: Sunday

In case anyone missed them/is interested. Mostly I wrote that all up for me, as I didn't want to forget everything that happened that weekend. But I put all my photos up, finally! Yay!

My gyn appointment on Thursday went well. My doctor took the implanon out of my arm without question once I told her what I'd been going through. I have a tiny incision and a weird bruise, but it doesn't hurt nearly as much as it did when I had it put in. So for now I'm supposed to monitor my cycle and how I'm feeling and go back in April for a follow-up. If my earlier issues return, or if I develop new ones, we'll revisit the idea of surgery.

Right now I feel okay. Not great, but certainly not bad. Still sort of dull around the edges and not sure what I want to do with myself. I've also been alternating between feeling really hungry and really sleepy. If I didn't know better, I'd say I was getting ready for a growth spurt. Still, I'm listening to my body and trying to give it what it wants. Mostly, that's been Cheeze-Its. >.>

I have started with daily yoga, though. I did have to skip Friday (my arm hurt too much), but otherwise it's been a whole week. Nothing too strenuous so far - just a couple of simple Sun Salutations after my morning shower - but I'm glad that it's becoming part of my morning routine.

It is absolutely pouring outside right now. But, I'm done with my work for the day, I've a chicken roasting in my crock pot, candles lit throughout the house, and I think I'm going to read for a while before dinner.

Heading out to my gyn this morning to have the implanon taken out of my arm. I'm nervous, and a little grossed out honestly, but Jon's going with me so I'll have someone to hold my hand. Also, yay for not having to ride the bus.

It's supposed to be 70 and sunny today. I think when I get back I shall sit on my porch and soak up some much-needed UV rays.

In other news, Disneyland photos this weekend, I swear.

I missed my LJ anniversary. Again. Ten years, holy cow. Yaaaaay.

( More personal health stuff )

Randomly, I realized that I currently have no hobbies. I miss having a creative outlet, but I don't know what I want to do. I have to think about that.

So, this last year or so has pretty much sucked in terms of my physical and emotional health. I've definitely had more down days than up, and right now I feel like I'm at a crossroad. I promised myself I'd wait until after the race to make any decisions, and so here I am. I need to figure out what to do next. I'm just not sure I know what that is.

( So, let's see if writing it out will help. Very rambly personal health musings, and something of a gameplan )

If you read all of that, you deserve a nap. Which is what I'm going to do right now.

Me and Kel at the entrance to Disneyland after the Tinker Bell Half Marathon, exhausted and triumphant. We're wearing our gorgeous Tinker Bell medals and our "I did it!" t-shirts. I have a lot of photos I'm still sorting through and a whole weekend post to write up, but I wanted to put this here first because...yeah. 13.1 miles. Wow.

This time tomorrow, I'll be heading to the airport with kelbebop and her awesome mom for our weekend at Disneyland. I'm about 95% packed - all that's left are the few things I'll need in the morning - and I'm going to check us in for our flight on-line in about an hour. Sometimes it really pays to be organized. I am READY.

Tomorrow we'll spend the afternoon at the race expo, picking up our bibs and spending too much money on commemorative items, I'm sure. Then we'll spend the evening at Downtown Disney for dinner and such. Saturday is our big Disneyland day. We will ride all the rides and see all the characters and eat all the food! But we'll have to make an early night of it as Sunday morning's race starts at 5:45, and we have to be there no later than 4:30. AM. Yes, you read that right. Fortunately, or hotel is across the street, so we don't have far to travel to get to the check-in point.

For those of you who follow me on Facebook, I have set it up so that my account will automatically update during the race. I really don't know if/how this will work (it's all done through Disney's race website), so I apologize in advance if it turns out to be super annoying. I will also upload photos from my phone. :D When I'm home, I will put everything here, too, of course.

Sunday afternoon we'll head back to the park for more fun (and food! I'm getting a giant corn dogs, dammit). Sunday evening will be spent in Disney California - we've made reservations at Ariel's Grotto for dinner and to watch the World of Color show from the restaurant's terrace. I'm very excited.

Then Monday I come home!

I'm really zen about the half marathon at this point. I have to think of it as simply an awesome activity in an awesome weekend. If I get too tired/hurt/etc. I don't have to finish. Although, let's be honest; I want my medal! I'm going to wear that thing forever. But, regarding the race, I'm not in it to win it, so to speak. I'm there to do my best, and more than anything, to HAVE FUN.

So, yes. I will see you all when I get back!

(I started this yesterday afternoon and then sort of forgot I was writing it. Oops. Thank goodness for saved drafts!)

The Tinker Bell Half Marathon is in two weeks. I may be freaking out a bit more than I'm letting on. It's an unknown thing, and unknown things scare me. I am rather like Piglet that way. But, I'm also really zen about it, if that makes any sense. I mean, I've been training for this thing for months, and while I'm nowhere near where I thought I'd be, I have made progress, and I'm sure it will be fine. I'm going to have fun, even if the Mouse Cart of Shame comes by and picks me up off the course for being too slow. The race is only a small part of my awesome birthday weekend, and I'm not going to let anything ruin it for me.

Somewhat related, I had to skip out on all my training this weekend due to a nasty tummy bug. I'd been excited to up our time on the track, too, but I ended up not even leaving the house. I don't know where it came from; it snuck up like a ninja and took me out by the knees. I'm just glad I seem to be over it. I feel SO much better this morning. Just in time for this lovely new weather pattern, haha. It's dropped 10 degrees and we're supposed to have showers all week starting Wednesday.

But, a good thing, Kel and I are starting to plan our itinerary for our Disneyland weekend. We want to see the World of Color show (we're making reservations at Ariel's Grotto restaurant for dinner, too), and we're definitely getting our picture taken with Tinker Bell after the race. Also, Star Tours in 3-D, yeeeeeah. I installed this awesome app on my phone that lets you know all the show times and character schedules, etc. There's an interactive map, you can make reservations...it's so awesome. I'm sure we'll use it a lot. Technology, yay!

Completely unrelated to Disneyland, Zack will be turning 17 tomorrow. I can hardly believe it. I don't feel old enough to have an almost-adult for a son. Then again, I'll be turning 40 in a few days, so I guess I am. How did that happen!? In honor of this momentous occasion, there will be pizza and cupcakes tomorrow night. I may be older, but I refuse to grow up. Aw, yeah.

Went to see my doctor today. I was finally able to get an appointment with her; she hadn't been available for a couple of months, and since this was a follow-up on a few things, I wanted to see her specifically rather than hash everything out with someone else.

Once of the things we talked about is how I have a near-constant ache in my left hip. It's in the back, where the pocket of your pants sit. Right where your sciatic nerve is. Yeah...I have sciatica. Yay. It's being caused most likely from overuse and, oddly enough, inactivity. It hurts a lot after I run, if I don't stretch out enough, or as I run, if I don't warm up enough. Also, it hurts a lot if I sit for too long. We talked at length about my training and how I take care of the pain, etc. Basically, what I need to do is exactly what I'm doing, just more of it. More warming up before running, more stretching afterwards. More hydration, more ice/heat as needed. Oh, and less sitting on my butt. I need to get up and move around every 20-30 minutes, especially at night.

Oh, the joys of being almost 40.

Still, it's better to know. Also, a funny aside: as I was laying on the table and having my hips examined, my doctor needed better access to my hipbone, so she just reached down and unzipped my pants! Not that I care - I've never been shy in front of doctors - but I admit, my first thought was, "Well, at least I have on cute underwear!"

Red boyshorts with little white hearts on them. In case anyone was wondering. :D

I thought to do that end of year meme, but the first half dozen or so questions were going to be answered with "No...no...nope...nuh uh...no..." so I decided to skip it. 2011 was hard. I was sick a lot. More than I let on. Finding out I had uterine fibroids upset me more than I let on, too. I felt betrayed by my own body. Especially on the days when I couldn't even get up and do normal day-to-day things. It was like I'd worked so hard to lose all that weight and get in shape, and then my body decided to fall apart. I'd never felt my age before and suddenly I felt twice it. 2011 was filled with a lot of personal struggles.

But, in retrospect, 2011 taught me a lot. Like, how to actually tell people when something is wrong. Both professionals and those close to me. I realized my doctor is not going to think I'm a drama queen if I tell her about the physical issues from which I am suffering. My friends and family aren't going to think that, either.

2011 taught me how to ask for what I need, and that it's okay to ask in the first place. To not ask is foolish at best, and masochistic at worst. 2011 taught me that no one's going to think less of me if I admit I'm having a bad day.

2011 also taught me to embrace the fact that I am an introvert. I need time alone, to recharge and think and just be in my own space. And that there's nothing wrong with that.

So for 2012, I want to continue down this path. Not selfishly, but I will be honest about how I feel and make myself a priority. I will say no to things I really don't want to do, or feel I should do only out of a sense of obligation. This year I will find something just for me that makes me happy.